Seeing as the World Cup is now over, and the transfer window has been open for a few weeks,and with the new Premier league season starting in less than a month it is time to discuss all things football again.
ARSENAL - Home - Somehow, its just not as good as a Nike Arsenal home kit. Not as clean... 7. Away - Surprisingly, on a similar template works better. 9. Third - It is a unique kit but a half-decent idea. Galatasaray (A) (UEFA Champions League)? 7.
ASTON VILLA - Home - Not sure the home kit needs the pinstripes. Is it not enough to be Aston Villa? 7. Away - This is where you bring in the pinstripes. Very 1982. 9.
BURNLEY - Home - Oh yes. Oh yes, oh yes. 10. Away - Can't go wrong with a good old black kit (although see Hull), but silver is great too! 9.
CHELSEA - Home - Look like QPR after someone spilt some of the blue ink over the final design. 7. Away - Yep. That's right. 8. Third - At least now they're trying to get those ink stains out, but it left a big smudge. 5 because it is blue ffs.
CRYSTAL PALACE - Home - They look more and more like a Barcelona tribute act. Managed by Tony Pulis (at time of starting the post). 7. Away - Everyone knows how well yellow and blue works on a football kit, but what if we made the blue much lighter. It'd look shite. 4.
EVERTON - Home - Retro. And good retro. 8½. Away - See Burnley, but knock off half a point for not having the silver. 8½. Third - Apparently Fiorentina weren't keen, but it is a good 'un. Inter (A)? 8.
HULL CITY - Home - It is a solid, tigerish, Hull kit. Chapeau. 9. Away - The literal only half-clash in the league is Newcastle (A), a match in which this would be useless. First rule of away kits is don't clash with the home kit, Einstein. 5
LEICESTER CITY - Home - It is clearly a Leicester kit, which seems to be beyond some. 8. Away - Going for gold. Getting beige. 6½. Third - They're going to look good on that trip to Boca Juniors? 7.
LIVERPOOL - Home - The less white the better. Quite some white. 8. Away - It is good; yellow a good solid Liverpool colour. 9. Third - Yet again, Warrior have delegated the Liverpool third kit to someone who was clearly pissed. 2.
MANCHESTER CITY - Home - Shorts are not white. Jimmy Hill would be impressed, but he's associated with Coventry. 6. Away - It's blue! There's a third kit coming, due to UEFA. But still quite nice. 7.
MANCHESTER UNITED - Home - Let's ignore the Chevvy stuff, and say that is a classic Manchester United kit. 9. Away - Seems they rotate this one to make sure they don't do it at the same time as Liverpool. 9. Third - Turns out the levée was not dry. OK, can't totally ignore it. A proper Man United trinity, this. 9.
NEWCASTLE UNITED - Home - Striped shirt. It's not difficult. Sod off. 4. Away - Somewhere around the middle of the colours you'd associate with Newcastle. Sir Alex Ferguson would not approve, and nor do I! 5. Fourth - You avarice driven twats. -2.
QUEENS PARK RANGERS - Home - Yeah, it's OK. QPRish. 8. Away - Hoops would be better. Take note, AC Milan, this is what your kit should look like. 9. Third - Shit! What are we going to wear at Palace? Plain white? 7.
SOUTHAMPTON - Home - RED AND WHITE STRIPES! Not brilliant, but still. 6¾. Away - Yeah, can take that. Blue and yellow is always good. 8.
STOKE CITY - Home - I swear they wore this kit a few years ago, and it wasn't great then. 6½. Away - Could be slightly better if the sash ran all the way up. 9.
SUNDERLAND - Home - If we use gold trim, some Mackems will need to buy new replica strips. Nice though. 8¾. Away - Yep, although as the blurb says, hope that ain't black. 9.
SWANSEA CITY - Home - It's an adidas white kit. Standard issue. 8. Away - I like, I like and I like a lot. Even better, the sponsor is probably cursing. 10.
TOTTENHAM HOTSPUR - Home - I sort of like Spurs kits when they're more plain, but this is good. 8¾ Away - Has the idea of a spotlight, really, and is frankly quite excellent. 9½. Third - Roll up to St. James' Park. But I can't complain. 9.
WEST BROMWICH ALBION - Home - That is correct, that says West Bromwich Albion. Not Bolton. 3. Away - At least they've got one kit that is quite nice. Anyone think it was Southampton's kit until they ditched adidas? 7.
WEST HAM UNITED - Home - That's not West Ham United. 5. Away - Stoke. That's what you were aiming at. 10. Third - I'm presuming Man City away, but it breaches the First Rule. 5.