Football The 2012/13 Season
- Thread starter landogeorgelewis1
- Start date
Attention! Attention!
Fire Sale now on at Bristol City FC!
Act now to be first in line for your choice of the
, sorry, that should read "well intentioned but unlucky footballers" that are currently on the payroll at Bristol City FC. 
And when we say "fire sale", we do not mean "cheap, must get rid of these players ASAP".
We mean, these players are so god damned hot, they must be on fire! Except this season. 
We'll look at all sensible offers, but if you hold out long enough, we'll accept what we're offered just to get rid of the dead wood that have dragged Bristol City FC down to League One.... Damn! I've said too much again!
So, come on down to Ashton Gate, Bristol, for your personal viewing of the merchandise! There are a couple of quality players just begging for a chance in the Premier League. The right clubs in the Championship may also have a chance of purchasing a couple of decent 2nd tear level players. And most importantly of all, any league 2 clubs willing to take a punt on some of our less than capable players can................
We are sorry for the interruption, but this broadcast has been curtailed before the announcer cocks it up again. Please do not adjust your Forum settings. This thread will resume normal service shortly.
In the mean time, tune in your radio for a little music.
I don't know. Is that a health condition? 
In all seriousness... who knows? Play your cards right, when the price is right and you may be in for a Brucey bonus.
In all seriousness... who knows? Play your cards right, when the price is right and you may be in for a Brucey bonus.
With Sir Alex Ferguson's retirement, I've been thinking about which managers would be next choice for each other Premier League club...
ARSENAL: Who they'd probably hire: Well, the dream of enticing Pep Guardiola is probably out of reach, so they'd possibly go for the high priest of the high-line passing dogma, Marcelo Bielsa, if of course he wasn't quite old. But he is Arsenal-style.
Who I'd like to see: What Arsenal need is an injection of cynicism, so some of their fans will probably want retired old man George Graham back. Maybe those talking about the Arsenal of old need a reality check - this one would be quite funny.
ASTON VILLA: Who they'd probably hire: I reckon they'd probably go and hire Neil Lennon given half a chance; the choice of Lambert itself suggested they can't get over Martin O'Neil.
Who I'd like to see: I would like to see Stan Collymore descend from the pulpit at some point, sorry Villa fans!
CHELSEA: Who they'd probably hire: Everyone. OK, José Mourinho. For now.
Who I'd like to see: Rafael BenÃtez. Tell me it's not been funny seeing Chelsea fans self-destruct as Rafa does OK.
EVERTON: Who they'd probably hire: OK, I'm about to get shot down. Gus Poyet. Now I only have a week or so before I'm proved an idiot.
Who I'd like to see: I'd like to see how Phil Neville would do, he seems like he'd be a good coach.
FULHAM: Who they'd probably hire: Someone middle-of-the-road. Someone extremely middle-of-the-road. In Hodgson's absence, possibly someone like Steve Bruce.
Who I'd like to see: A club run by, and for, and to showcase, Dimitar Berbatov. A player-manager with swagger, I'll have you know!
LIVERPOOL: Who they'd probably hire: In the absence of the late Bill Shankly, its starting to get a little bit desparate at Liverpool if they decide David Brent is not the man. I think they'd still go Roberto Martinez, if they got the chance.
Who I'd like to see: Preferably someone who doesn't froth at the mouth attempting to defend the indefensable from a certain Uruguayan forward. Maybe Sven-Goran Eriksson might be the least likely mouth frother.
MANCHESTER CITY: Who they'd probably hire: Anyone who they could get their oil-rich paws on, probably Carlo Ancellotti when PSG get bored.
Who I'd like to see: Go on then, give Sam Allardyce an unlimited budget and end the excuses. If he attempts to buy Kevin Nolan (and he will) sack him.
MANCHESTER UNITED: Who they've already hired: David Moyes
Who I'd like to see: We are looking for someone who would be hilariously mad and utterly connected with Manchester United. It just has to be, doesn't it? Eric Cantona.
NEWCASTLE UNITED: Who they'd probably hire: By the time Pardew has finished his contract, any number of people could have retired. But if they sacked him tomorrow they'd probably try to hire Harry Redknapp.
Who I'd like to see: Follow Pardew with Alan Curbishley again, just to stop him being the favourite for any and every job.
NORWICH CITY: Who they'd probably hire: I reckon they'd hire Steve Bruce as well; he used to play for them, you know...!
Who I'd like to see: I can just sense that Delia Smith fancies giving it a right old bash!
QPR: Who they'd probably hire: While second-guessing what QPR are going to do next is a fool's game, I can't help but feel it'd probably be Alan Pardew or something like that. While all the time Tony Fernandes tells us he's Alex Ferguson.
Who I'd like to see: Joseph Barton. If a man is bored of London, then he is a helmet. Probably.
READING: Who they'd probably hire: You just wonder if Ian Holloway is on the radar at Reading if all doesn't go well for Adkins.
Who I'd like to see: Well, they'll be in the Championship, so maybe Ian Holloway won't be on the telly that much.
SOUTHAMPTON: Who they'd probably hire: Oh, someone hip, young and foreign. Vincenzo Montella, probably!
Who I'd like to see: Someone who is completely and utterly anti-Cortese. Tony Pulis would fit the bill perfectly. Which brings us on to...
STOKE CITY: Who they'd probably hire: I half expect them to go with Jack Charlton, but they might find him over-concerned with pretty, passing football.
Who I'd like to see: Someone like Roberto Martinez, who would have to sell all the players and create a less ugly team.
SUNDERLAND: Who they'd probably hire: It'd have to be back to boring and middle-of-the-road, so Paul Lambert continues his quest to manage all the same clubs as Martin O'Neill.
Who I'd like to see: Though it was not special, Roy Keane kept them up and got entertainingly miffed for most of the time, while clearly menacing his players. It was interesting!
SWANSEA CITY: Who they'd probably hire: Someone like Gianfranco Zola, something that will make sense with hindsight.
Who I'd like to see: I want them to keep Michael Laudrup forever, so I'm not even going to talk about this.
TOTTENHAM: Who they'd probably hire: They'd be all over Jurgen Klopp like a rash, wouldn't they?
Who I'd like to see: Lets see if Frank de Boer has got it!
WEST BROMWICH ALBION: Who they'd probably hire: Who is getting chucked out of Liverpool this year? Jamie Carragher? That does seem to be their primary recruiting pattern.
Who I'd like to see: Steve Bull. I do love a conflicted set of fans.
WEST HAM UNITED: Who they'd probably hire: The minds of Messers Sullivan and Gold are particularly dense forests to cut through, forests used to make paper for porn. Paolo di Canio would be popular and interesting.
Who I'd like to see: I'd like to see West Ham become half-way likeable again really, so lets get Martin Jol in from Fulham!
WIGAN ATHLETIC: Who they'd probably hire: This one could go anywhere, really. MK Dons' Karl Robinson is as likely as anyone else.
Who I'd like to see: Ole-Gunnar Solksjaer. That'd be grand.
ARSENAL: Who they'd probably hire: Well, the dream of enticing Pep Guardiola is probably out of reach, so they'd possibly go for the high priest of the high-line passing dogma, Marcelo Bielsa, if of course he wasn't quite old. But he is Arsenal-style.
Who I'd like to see: What Arsenal need is an injection of cynicism, so some of their fans will probably want retired old man George Graham back. Maybe those talking about the Arsenal of old need a reality check - this one would be quite funny.
ASTON VILLA: Who they'd probably hire: I reckon they'd probably go and hire Neil Lennon given half a chance; the choice of Lambert itself suggested they can't get over Martin O'Neil.
Who I'd like to see: I would like to see Stan Collymore descend from the pulpit at some point, sorry Villa fans!
CHELSEA: Who they'd probably hire: Everyone. OK, José Mourinho. For now.
Who I'd like to see: Rafael BenÃtez. Tell me it's not been funny seeing Chelsea fans self-destruct as Rafa does OK.
EVERTON: Who they'd probably hire: OK, I'm about to get shot down. Gus Poyet. Now I only have a week or so before I'm proved an idiot.
Who I'd like to see: I'd like to see how Phil Neville would do, he seems like he'd be a good coach.
FULHAM: Who they'd probably hire: Someone middle-of-the-road. Someone extremely middle-of-the-road. In Hodgson's absence, possibly someone like Steve Bruce.
Who I'd like to see: A club run by, and for, and to showcase, Dimitar Berbatov. A player-manager with swagger, I'll have you know!
LIVERPOOL: Who they'd probably hire: In the absence of the late Bill Shankly, its starting to get a little bit desparate at Liverpool if they decide David Brent is not the man. I think they'd still go Roberto Martinez, if they got the chance.
Who I'd like to see: Preferably someone who doesn't froth at the mouth attempting to defend the indefensable from a certain Uruguayan forward. Maybe Sven-Goran Eriksson might be the least likely mouth frother.
MANCHESTER CITY: Who they'd probably hire: Anyone who they could get their oil-rich paws on, probably Carlo Ancellotti when PSG get bored.
Who I'd like to see: Go on then, give Sam Allardyce an unlimited budget and end the excuses. If he attempts to buy Kevin Nolan (and he will) sack him.
MANCHESTER UNITED: Who they've already hired: David Moyes
Who I'd like to see: We are looking for someone who would be hilariously mad and utterly connected with Manchester United. It just has to be, doesn't it? Eric Cantona.
NEWCASTLE UNITED: Who they'd probably hire: By the time Pardew has finished his contract, any number of people could have retired. But if they sacked him tomorrow they'd probably try to hire Harry Redknapp.
Who I'd like to see: Follow Pardew with Alan Curbishley again, just to stop him being the favourite for any and every job.
NORWICH CITY: Who they'd probably hire: I reckon they'd hire Steve Bruce as well; he used to play for them, you know...!
Who I'd like to see: I can just sense that Delia Smith fancies giving it a right old bash!
QPR: Who they'd probably hire: While second-guessing what QPR are going to do next is a fool's game, I can't help but feel it'd probably be Alan Pardew or something like that. While all the time Tony Fernandes tells us he's Alex Ferguson.
Who I'd like to see: Joseph Barton. If a man is bored of London, then he is a helmet. Probably.
READING: Who they'd probably hire: You just wonder if Ian Holloway is on the radar at Reading if all doesn't go well for Adkins.
Who I'd like to see: Well, they'll be in the Championship, so maybe Ian Holloway won't be on the telly that much.
SOUTHAMPTON: Who they'd probably hire: Oh, someone hip, young and foreign. Vincenzo Montella, probably!
Who I'd like to see: Someone who is completely and utterly anti-Cortese. Tony Pulis would fit the bill perfectly. Which brings us on to...
STOKE CITY: Who they'd probably hire: I half expect them to go with Jack Charlton, but they might find him over-concerned with pretty, passing football.
Who I'd like to see: Someone like Roberto Martinez, who would have to sell all the players and create a less ugly team.
SUNDERLAND: Who they'd probably hire: It'd have to be back to boring and middle-of-the-road, so Paul Lambert continues his quest to manage all the same clubs as Martin O'Neill.
Who I'd like to see: Though it was not special, Roy Keane kept them up and got entertainingly miffed for most of the time, while clearly menacing his players. It was interesting!
SWANSEA CITY: Who they'd probably hire: Someone like Gianfranco Zola, something that will make sense with hindsight.
Who I'd like to see: I want them to keep Michael Laudrup forever, so I'm not even going to talk about this.
TOTTENHAM: Who they'd probably hire: They'd be all over Jurgen Klopp like a rash, wouldn't they?
Who I'd like to see: Lets see if Frank de Boer has got it!
WEST BROMWICH ALBION: Who they'd probably hire: Who is getting chucked out of Liverpool this year? Jamie Carragher? That does seem to be their primary recruiting pattern.
Who I'd like to see: Steve Bull. I do love a conflicted set of fans.
WEST HAM UNITED: Who they'd probably hire: The minds of Messers Sullivan and Gold are particularly dense forests to cut through, forests used to make paper for porn. Paolo di Canio would be popular and interesting.
Who I'd like to see: I'd like to see West Ham become half-way likeable again really, so lets get Martin Jol in from Fulham!
WIGAN ATHLETIC: Who they'd probably hire: This one could go anywhere, really. MK Dons' Karl Robinson is as likely as anyone else.
Who I'd like to see: Ole-Gunnar Solksjaer. That'd be grand.
teabagyokel with that analysis you should be on Soccer Saturday with Jeff and the guys
Glad that Wigan won the FA cup, always nice that a new team wins the cup. Shame they will be probably be relegated next weekend though.
If they can learn to concentrate in defensive possession, then you know what, they could be fantastic!
It's pretty much last chance saloon for Wigan tonight.
And they are outta here.
Chelsea are truly the Kings of Europe (well for another 10 days anyway).
Shirt sales donkey decides to retire. Only 8 years too late...
http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/football/22558393
http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/football/22558393
He was more like a one trick pony.
