Clip The Xmas 
The Lewis Hamilton Non-News Thread
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Lewis Hamilton's solutions for global poverty have come up way short of the mark.
There is far too much negativity about Hamilton in this thread. I read a story recently that said his farts were so divine that just the smallest whiff could cure the blind. Why aren't the press talking about this and not a silly incident involving a jacket and tie?
Lewis Hamilton gets tattoo that looks like its been done in biro
Lewis Hamilton gets inked in New York with massive new shoulder tattoo
Rumours that its the blueprints of a prison he's planning to break someone out of (prob his dad) are yet to be confirmed.
Lewis Hamilton gets inked in New York with massive new shoulder tattoo
Rumours that its the blueprints of a prison he's planning to break someone out of (prob his dad) are yet to be confirmed.
Hamilton has been accused by the whole world of ruining F1 for the rest of time, after once again qualifying in pole position for the Hungarian GP.
BBC Sport - Lewis Hamilton has destroyed F1
BBC Sport - Lewis Hamilton has destroyed F1
Rosberg said:
Button said:
Raikkonen said:
Incubus
Champion Elect
The paddock has today gone into overdrive following the spotting by an unnamed onlooker of a pearl of sweat coming off Hamilton's forehead as he took off his helmet following his victorious pole at the Hungarorring.
this has led to rife speculation that Lewis may be the owner of undisclosed glands. Paddock insiders now believe the British driver has a gland-related clause in his contract which could potentially come into effect should his gland expectoration levels that exceed an undeterminated amount understood to be measured telemetrically through Mercedes's FIA-sanctioned bolidywastographer.
An unnamed source within the Mercedes camp who preferred to remain anonymous under the name of Niki Lauda has refused to comment other than to say "it's all a load of bollocks that some twat at Clip the Apex who's drunk as a fart has just come up with".
The author of this post is barely available for comment.
this has led to rife speculation that Lewis may be the owner of undisclosed glands. Paddock insiders now believe the British driver has a gland-related clause in his contract which could potentially come into effect should his gland expectoration levels that exceed an undeterminated amount understood to be measured telemetrically through Mercedes's FIA-sanctioned bolidywastographer.
An unnamed source within the Mercedes camp who preferred to remain anonymous under the name of Niki Lauda has refused to comment other than to say "it's all a load of bollocks that some twat at Clip the Apex who's drunk as a fart has just come up with".
The author of this post is barely available for comment.
I saw that video. While you can't blame him for having sweat glands, his helmet-removal technique is extraordinarily poor. He already lost the 2007 Championship because of this, and he'll have more heartache if it continues.
Incubus
Champion Elect
The paddock has today gone into overdrive following the disclosure of rumours that the Mercedes garage is a cocaine-oozing den where illegal substances are regularly used.
Hitherto unsubstantiated claims were inadvertently given a public admission by Mr Hamilton's claims that his co-defendant Mr Rosberg had "taken his line". This has led to accusations of favouritism between the two team-mates in the face of Mr Rosberg's apparent refusal to share his lines.
An unnamed source within the Mercedes camp who preferred to remain anonymous under the name of Charlie-Niki Loudass has refused to comment on the rumours as he was "busy watching the replays while looking for that bastard what nicked one of my eyeballs".
Hitherto unsubstantiated claims were inadvertently given a public admission by Mr Hamilton's claims that his co-defendant Mr Rosberg had "taken his line". This has led to accusations of favouritism between the two team-mates in the face of Mr Rosberg's apparent refusal to share his lines.
An unnamed source within the Mercedes camp who preferred to remain anonymous under the name of Charlie-Niki Loudass has refused to comment on the rumours as he was "busy watching the replays while looking for that bastard what nicked one of my eyeballs".
... 
... What's the betting that someone, somewhere will get that idea and run with it as real?
Olivier
Race Winner
This seems to be taken from WTF1; why would Williams comment on Nico's performance and didn't Patrick Head retire a few years ago?
I can assure you I haven't taken it from WTF1. 
The Patrick Head joke was harking back to when Rosberg used to win FP1 every sodding race in 2009, then be nowhere on Saturday/Sunday.
The Patrick Head joke was harking back to when Rosberg used to win FP1 every sodding race in 2009, then be nowhere on Saturday/Sunday.
Olivier
Race Winner
Just watched the Australian GP drivers' press conference, amongst the questions about the race and the 2016 season, it was the Daily Mail who were getting to the key issues of the season ahead:
Q: (Jon McEvoy - Daily Mail) Lewis, are you using a Blackberry or an iPhone?
LH: Both
Q: (Jon McEvoy - Daily Mail) Lewis, are you using a Blackberry or an iPhone?
LH: Both
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