TACTICAL PREVIEW - STOKE CITY vs SWANSEA CITY & ARSENAL vs TOTTENHAM - PREMIER LEAGUE 26/2/11
Big Bloke City play Brcellwna in a fierce clash of styles at the Britannia Stadium on Sunday. Brcellwna's formation will be an intricate web of triangles designed to confuse and bemuse any opponent (shown in orange) while Big Bloke will play 4-4-2, probably.
While Brcellwna will play the ball an average of 3m per pass, Big Bloke are likely to push an average of 50m per pass (including throw-ins), using diagonals to make their passes longer and probably less successful. It is considered by experts that Brcellwna will be interested in playing the ball, while Big Bloke will be more interested in playing the man.
NORTH LONDON DERBY
Another game played this Sunday will be the North London Derby between Saint Harry's Super Spurs (SHSS) and Arsenal University. Having seen all their best players graduate last summer, and with Jack Wilshire taking a leave of absence this semester, Arsenal U are having their academic standards challenged this year.
SHSS are likely to line up in a sort-of 4-4-2 formation with Scott Parker attempting to block shots that will never come. Arsenal U are likely to field 4 defenders and 6 midfielders. Though those midfielders are likely to be taking courses as diverse as Running Quickly, Scoring Goals, Advanced Pissing About and Being Tomas Rosicky, their main function is to pass the ball between each other without crossing the red line displayed above before SHSS nick the ball and break.
Meanwhile, SHSS's attack is likely to be founded on the twin principles of working out where Gareth Bale is at the precise moment of time, and passing it to him. Modric, Assou-Ekotto, Friedel, Adebayor, etc..., are likely to have recovered from Facuptieataleagueonegrounditis and be ready to play this fixture.