F1 2112

Discussion in 'Clip The Apex Presents...' started by teabagyokel, Apr 14, 2012.

  1. teabagyokel

    teabagyokel #dejavu Valued Member

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    APEX SPORT - QUALIFYING
    With Practice results now considered to be entirely meaningless, Apex Sport have turned up in Zhangzhou in time for qualifying. And, rumours our intrepid reporters were got lost on the roads leading into Zhangzhou have been scotched entirely.

    Q1 The faster cars were out quicker on the "Toad" tyres, except of course for McLaren's home boy Jack E. Chan. Chan was sent out by McLaren on regular dry tyres they'd somehow accidentally brought from Iran, thus his car sank on the way into the water section on the first lap. A red flag was produced, Chan was uninjured but he starts the race last.

    Kakari and Ecossais of HRT managed to set a time good enough to join them on the grid, thus assuring a full grid will go ahead. Yamamoto of Flabio Moda was also unable to qualify, while Sheikh Al-Khalifa managed to drive so slowly on the water section he drifted out to sea, colliding with his own gigantic yacht. Fortunately, he'd already set a fast enough time to get on the grid.

    It was not surprising to see Rolando Piquet eliminated, but his brother's elimination was a shock for a confident Ferrari, especially behind the Hesketh. So the last place was between the two McDonalds cars, and the faster ecological disaster on circuit turned out to be driven by Jacqui Bolt, who got through to Q2.

    OUT: 19: Richards, 20: R. Piquet, 21: N. Piquet, 22: Al-Khalifa, 23: Yamamoto, 24: Ecossais, 25: Kakari, 26: Chan (stewards found Chan OK to race)

    Q2 Last week's winner van der Liegen leapt out of his car to go for a comfort break after Q1, but he forgot that he needed to return to complete Q2. Therefore, he will start 18th having not set a three-lap-run-time. Bolt was predictably just going through the motions, despite the protests of anyone who remembered the wildlife which lived in the Jiulong River before McDonald's turned up.

    Flabio Moda also did not expect to get this far and it was Karamalitenko who finished second-last of the finishers. Durham's chauffeur's lung capacity was sufficient for him to set an impressive time, alas not good enough to beat Akuritaxpe in the Waltz, who was nowhere near his team-mate, used to driving on water after being brought up in Wales.

    The last place in Q3 was fought between Button, the two Always girls and O'Reilly. The Irishman pounded around two brilliant laps, nearly lost it at the last corner on lap 3 but edged out Button. Senna and Washington were distracted by their proximity and their attempts to blow kisses at each other when they passed ruined their middle laps.

    OUT: 11: Button, 12: Senna, 13: Washington, 14: Akuritaxpe, 15: Durham, 16: Karamalitenko, 17: Bolt, 18: van der Liegen

    Q3 The first two minute eliminator predictably saw all cars out running. Unfortunately, Larsson lost drive on the main straight as the alun key required for his drive train had not been provided. This meant a red flag, meaning they just had enough time to get around second lap and eliminate Shavnov.

    OUT: 9: Shavnov, 10: Larsson

    Jones "afternoons in Cardiff" training was insufficient for the second eliminator as cars with much quicker dry times were able to outpace him. Ontário's temporal issues were not over, as went to the pits believing the session was over, having apparently completed Q3. Causality be damned, he qualifies in 8th.

    OUT: 7: Jones, 8: Ontário

    Perfectelli was struggling with rear grip and set a slow lap time due to facing backwards throughout most of it. Lakepi was edged out of the next session by Dzevsky.

    OUT: 5: Lakepi, 6: Perfectelli

    O'Reilly's wonderful progress was stopped on his lap when he was blocked by the quick-moving Reichsmuller and he lost his rag and spun into the wall. Dzevsky, watching behind, was forced to brake hard and was collected by O'Reilly, causing a red flag and a Reichsmuller/Alonso show-down.

    OUT: 3: O'Reilly 4: Dzevsky

    Alonso was quickest though, those 9 months non-existant testing were to pay dividends. The experience of Reichsmuller was not enough and he was 2 tenths down. Alonso could barely remember his win a mere four weeks ago from our perspective, but there were no signs of rustiness.

    1: Alonso, 2: Reichsmuller

    Well, Reichsmuller will be heading to the stewards and so will O'Reilly. Stay tuned to Apex Sport to find out what happens.
     
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  3. teabagyokel

    teabagyokel #dejavu Valued Member

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    STEWARDS RULE COLLISION ACCIDENTAL IN LANDMARK RULING

    In a decision thought to be unparalleled in the last century, Grand Prix stewards today elected that the Q3 incident involving temperamental Irishman Gilbert O'Reilly and former Champion Toni Reichsmuller was entirely accidental and this no-one should be punished for it.

    It is believed a such a landmark decision could have a huge effect on the future of F1, with racing seemingly set to be encouraged by the FIA, despite a century of intransigence. There might be accidents when really fast cars are put next to each other on a narrow-ish strip of tarmac seems to be official policy, and only time will tell the effect this may have on the product and the brain-in-a-jar who presided over it.
     
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  4. Fenderman

    Fenderman Rooters Reporter

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    APEX SPORT 2112
    Tech-Reveal Double Whammy Special
    In a first for Apex Sport we bring you technical updates from two World Class events. Of course it wasn't intentional but who are we to argue when time itself decides to intervene. the jury is still out on who exactly was responsible for all this but the ramifications are hurtling through the sport like meteors over Siberia. So here we go with our earth shattering revelations from the
    Koka-Kola Formula One Iranian Grand Prix
    and

    http://cliptheapex.com/attachments/CTA-png.6219/

    Editorial

    It is often said that history repeats itself. Funnily enough all is not well in several of the team camps. Accusations have been made behind the scenes that team orders have been interfering with results. That is certainly true in the case of the Larsson's dickhead engineer who ordered Alun keys from Quickscrewfit (a tool shop in Blighty). Unfortunately he did that in writing and, as we all know from checking the Oxford/English, an Alun key sounds like an Allen key but isn't one. The problem didn't exist for Larsson's team at the Koka-kola event. It was only when the team unpacked their gear here in China that they discovered that a large quantity of their specialist tools, including their hex keys, are missing. Consequently, Larsson's car took to the track with all of the Allen bolts hand tightened by one of the android technicians. Larsson's car was badly affected since it had a complete strip down before being shipped here. Anyhowsy, more of that in Brad's Tech Notebook, the team orders folk's are complaining about are the ones that used to be known by quaint codewords like "FIFTY", "NUMPTY" and "No.2". Our intrepid reporter teabagyokel will keep us all posted about all that stuff as the season rumbles on. meanwhile here's Brad ...

    Brad Routon's Notebook

    Larsson's Al IKEA Islam car suffered duel drive-shaft failure as all the Allen bolts came unscrewed. Team boss ...... said heads were due to roll as the bolts were only hand tightened. One of his lackeys had put in the order for hex keys calling them Alun keys. That would have been okay if the order had been made over the phone but in writing that's all wrong. Heh, heh. Of course the spelling issue is one of debate since there are a lot of ways to spell Alan, Allen, Aloon, Alun and some stockists have got into the habit of accepting the term. Unfortunately for Al IKEA their suppliers are pedantic retards and don't understand anything outside of their own narrow linguistic parameters. Sometime around 1910 the Allen Manufacturing Company of Hartford, Connecticut is credited with inventing the tool. The Allen name is the company's registered trademark. Interestingly Allen Co. is owned by Apex Tool Group who detest the generic use of their name. This is probably because no-one buys real Allen keys any more because nobody can tell a genuine Allen key from a phony hex key. That is probably because all hex keys look like Allen keys and visa versa. Here are some Allen keys and Hex keys. Spot the difference.

    hex keys.jpg hex keys.jpg
    Real Allen Keys ..........................Hex Keys - not Allen Keys

    Meanwhile, ARSE systems are causing a lot of problems for some of the teams. Rumours abound that it is the ARSE's that are holding back car development rather than the other way around. Using the devices to alter reality seems to affect the configuration of the cars in some way. The suspicion is that with each divergence through time to effect an overtake some of the cars appear to revert to early states of development. One team that we cannot name for legal reasons found that after repeated use they had completely lost their KNACKERS as if they never had any in the first place. One engineer said "We feel like we've been castrated. Our drivers are totally impotent when it comes to asserting themselves or defending their positions on track." Another said "It's not a nice feeling."


    Brad Routon. Rootersport (A division of Rooters Interplanetary News Corp)8-)
     
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  5. teabagyokel

    teabagyokel #dejavu Valued Member

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    APEX SPORT RACE REPORT

    So after a non-stewarding decision, the cars are ready to line up on the grid for the Chinese Grand Prix. Both McLarens have been fitted with appropriate tyres as MP37 Executioner Lord Ron Dennis fumed back at the Woking base. Roberto Ontário turned up just in time, despite a familiarity with the concept of time which was becoming less robust. And Roberto Alonso was sitting on pole for his first race for an extremely long time.

    There was a huge issue in mid-field on lap 1 as Durham, Karamalitenko, Bolt and van der Liegen try to get into the corner at the same time. Bolt was forced to brake, from where she was rear-ended by team-mate Richards, eliminating both McDonald's cars to the delight of Greenpeace. Karamalitenko also suffered damage and Durham lost drive when his chauffeur lost consciousness. The chauffeur is in a stable condition this evening in Zhangzhou Infirmary.

    Thus attention was distracted from the front where O'Reilly got past both the front row starters off the grid. With the Safety Hovercraft out to clear up the debris for a while, the order would be set:

    Lap 5 (SH): O'Reilly, Alonso, Reichsmuller, Lakepi, Dzevsky, Perfectelli, Jones, Ontário, Larsson, Button

    As the Safety Car came in, Ontário pulled into the pits for a set of the "Frog" tyres, confusing early in the race for the middle of the race. He was sent out again, with growing concerns into how his collision at Busheshr has affected his temporality. O'Reilly continued to lead but got put under pressure from Alonso, with the two Minardi-Sauber-Williams' holding station behind. Skoda's Perfectelli, meanwhile, started weaving behind his team-mate, getting rather cross on team radio.

    Lap 10: O'Reilly, Alonso, Reichsmuller, Lakepi, Dzevsky, Perfectelli, Jones, Larsson, Button, Shavnov

    Chan was already closing in on the top 10 when his pit-stop saw him lose a load of time as McLaren kept changing their minds about what tyre to put on. A quick thinking Alonso quickly ducked into the AHR garage to grab the undercut on O'Reilly. After the stops O'Reilly had been caught by Alonso and came out of the pits alongside Shavnov, 20 seconds down. He clipped the Russian, but both continued. Perfectelli came out just behind Dzevsky and threw his racing gloves at his team-mate.

    Perfectelli weaved behind the Czech and made a rather optimistic move down the inside, nearly taking his team-mate off before getting past. Unfortunately, he was given the meatball flag for driving without gloves. Meanwhile, the glove hit the front wing of the luckless Shavnov, dislodging the endplate weakened by the collision with the McLaren. Ferrari, as usual, pitted Shavnov for the wing change immediately.

    Lap 17: Alonso, O'Reilly, Reichsmuller, Lakepi, Dzevsky, Jones, Larsson, Button, Senna, Washington

    Jones' defence against Larsson was ended on lap 19; Ontário started a slowing down lap thinking the race was finished and soaked up the adulation of the crowd on the run-off, before parking the car in the usual finishing place. He was taken to a hospital, and diagnosed with temporal flu.

    O'Reilly, with a breath of wind behind him, started bothering Alonso. The Spaniard, officially not race rusty, slipped wide on the first corner, but got O'Reilly back on the water straight. O'Reilly had another go and took the lead into the rather unusual overtaking opportunity down at turn 18.

    Lap 26: O'Reilly, Alonso, Reichsmuller, Lakepi, Dzevsky, Larsson, Jones, Button, Senna, Washington

    McLaren showed their speed when Chan recovered past van der Liegen for 11th. His pass on Washington into the water section was incredible, but obstructed his team-mate who was lapping and let Alonso through for the lead. Lakepi was being caught by Dzevsky, but the Czech was still suffering from shock after the previously mild-mannered Perfectelli tried to cut him up and was overpolite in his attempt to pass the Tongan. Perfectelli, meanwhile, pulled into the pits a lap down to try to obstruct Dzevsky's second stop, but was deliberately fed the wrong information by his team. The World Champion was losing it.

    Lap 34: Alonso, O'Reilly, Reichsmuller, Lakepi, Dzevsky, Larsson, Jones, Button, Senna, Chan

    Lakepi's struggles and Dzevsky's recalcitrance continued through the section. A train formed behind the Czech driver, allowing Jones to nip back past Larsson into the water section. The slowness of the Tongan contributed to the crash behind as Larsson, Button, Senna and Chan attempted the wet-dry corner at the same time, totalling all but Chan's cars and bringing out the Safety Hovercraft.

    Lap 40 (SH): Alonso, O'Reilly, Reichsmuller, Lakepi, Dzevsky, Chan, Washington, van der Liegen, R. Piquet, Ecossais

    With so few cars left in the race, HRT were on for a point. Al-Khalifa's chase of Ecossais was looking futile, but they were both getting caught by the inexplicably out-of-position Akuritaxpe and the slightly less unlikely out-of position Nelson Piquet V.

    The Hovercraft was in late on lap 48, giving only 4 laps left. Akuritaxpe and Nelson got quickly past the Sheikh, but were unable to catch Ecossais, who took HRT's first point after 100 years of on-off trying. There would also be a tempered celebration at Hesketh. Chan limped on but was caught by Washington and van der Liegen, with the Dutchman sneaking past Mary too. But O'Reilly's failed attempt to pass Alonso saw him storm off and only appear on the podium when he was dragged up there by RoboHerbieBlache.

    A second win of the year for Rolando Alonso. Fernando might have even been proud...


    RACE POSITIONS
    1. R. Alonso (AHR)
    2. G. O'Reilly (McLaren)
    3. T. Reichsmuller (Minardi-Williams-Sauber)
    4. K. Lakepi (Minardi-Williams-Sauber)
    5. K. Dzevsky (Skoda)
    6. A. van der Liegen (Tango)
    7. M. Washington (Always)
    8. J. Chan (McLaren)
    9. R. Piquet (Hesketh)
    10. T. Ecossais (HRT)

    CTA.png

    CTA.png

    Perfectelli, in particular, wouldn't mind if the next race was on the moon. Which, of course, it is. See you there!
     
  6. Fenderman

    Fenderman Rooters Reporter

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    APEX SPORT 2112

    Rooters News Special Reports

    Dateline 1st April 2112. 09:30 hrs.

    Esta Dia en el Tribunal Provinciales de la Asturias

    Rad Booton reports from

    The Trial of Rolando Alonso – Dia Uno

    Following the near tragic events at the Ovidea Test in May 2112 (i.e. the first bit before the nine month time-shift) Rolando Alonso has appeared in front of the Magistrate in the Audiencia Provincial de la Oviedo, Asturia, just down the road from his family home in Ovidea. It was notable that an observer from El Tribunal Supremo de la Espania (Spain's highest court in Convent of the Salesas Reales, Madrid) was present. Rooters News understands that this unusual step was taken due to the international character of the events and the knowledge that should Alonso be convicted, his appeals are sure to run on with the case ending up there sometime in the future. Perhaps even in the past if there are more time-divergences. Who knows.

    Rolando sat expressionless, apart from the occasional flutter of one of his rather large eyebrows, as the prosecution presented a summary of the accident at the Ovidea Test Day, describing it as a wanton disregard for human life with intent to cause fatal harm.

    Asked by the Judge, “Did you, Rolando Alonso do thees heedioss theeng?” Alonso replied, “No, en absoluto. Yo no soy culpable.”

    A number of written statements, on Alonso's behalf, were presented by the defense team to the Judge as they requested bail. On granting bail in the sum of €1 million the judge granted Alonso leave to continue his racing career on the condition that he stays at home with his parents in Ovidea during weekdays and ordered him not to leave the planet, even on business.

    As he was leaving the court, Alonso told Rooters News “Staying at home with my parents on weekdays! WTF? I haven't even been tried and found guilty and he sentences me to that?. Ees unbeleebabble (as grand-dad's team-mate Flippy Massage used to say).”

    The trial continues

    Brad Routon. Rootersport (A division of Rooters Interplanetary News Corp)8-)
     
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  7. teabagyokel

    teabagyokel #dejavu Valued Member

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    APOLLONO ARRIVES IN ASTURIAS COURTROOM

    They say that the competitive trial was a relatively recent invention, but today the competing defendant in the Asturias v Alonso v Apollono trial arrived in court. Suzanna Apollono pleaded not guilty to the attempted murder charge at the Magistrates' Court, adding only that it was Alonso who was guilty.

    Her apparent attempt to escape the police at Iranian GP practice by using her AHR car "proved she was a flight risk" according to the magistrate, meaning she will not be allowed to leave Ovidea, and will be asked to return her licences for driving cars, trains, buses, Formula One cars, spaceships, motorbikes, powered scooters, sea-faring cruise liners and helicopters.

    Asturias Provincial Prosecutors were criticised for keeping Alonso as a defendant when it looked likely that he was not involved. The Minister for Justice of Asturias said "Meh!", and suggested that the public had not seen the evidence. Rumours that the Prosecutors will be going for a double prosecution have been widespread, but the Justice Minister was bound not to comment on proceedings.

    In other news, Alonso's grounding on Earth means he will not be travelling to the Lunar Grand Prix, with team principal Nicole Hamilton hiring Tina Rachtova to drive the AHR again when Alonso cannot make a race. Rachtova finished 7th in Iran for the Constructors' Championship leaders.
     
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  8. teabagyokel

    teabagyokel #dejavu Valued Member

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    APEX SPORT - CIRCUIT PREVIEW

    On the face of it, the Sea of Tranquility Marina Circuit is not the most challenging that has ever been devised. The design process was more concerned with keeping the fans' oxygen capsules updated where they deviated from the Moonbase VII City structure, and ensuring marshal posts were fitted with appropriate air-locks to allow the recovery of cars and drivers. The turn 1 hairpin is an evident attempt to emulate La Source, and the rest of the circuit would, on Earth, be a relatively unchallenging series of seemingly never ending corners.

    However, the lack of atmosphere on the Lunar surface makes this circuit difficult. Since it is held outside, the incredible aerodynamic devices that the teams have spent the majority of the year developing will have absolutely no effect, and mechanical grip will be the name of the game. The teams each have their own ways of dealing with this, as Brad Rooton Fenderman will be all too keen to explain. But Ferrari traditionally do well here, and Dimitri Shavnov will be confident of adding another win on the satellite.

    The drivers' testimonials of the circuit make for interesting reading:

    "We don't do the lunar circuit in GP2, so it will be an interesting challenge. I'm hoping we'll be fighting at the front again!" - K. Dzevsky
    "I do love circuit, it suits me down to tee. Ferrari big team, need do better in Championship, best place to try!" - D. Shavnov
    "I'm on the MOOOOOOOOOOON!" - A. van der Liegen
    "Its just nice to be driving a car; any circuit is fantastic to repay AHR's faith!" - T. Rachtova
    "I love visiting the good chaps here at Moonbase VII, they make some rather good port. The circuit is spiffing too, I think the atmosphere is great if you'll pardon the inaccuracy!" - L. Durham

    So there we go. A popular place to come for F1, and hopefully another great race!
     
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  9. Fenderman

    Fenderman Rooters Reporter

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    APEX SPORT 2112

    Rooters News Special Reports

    Dateline 4th April 2112. 09:30 hrs.

    Esta Dia en el Tribunal Provinciales de la Asturias

    Rad Booton reports from

    The Trial of Rolando Alonso – Dia Cinco

    Days tres y quatro at the Audiencia Provincial de la Oviedo, Asturia, of the Asturias v Alonso v Apollono trial were a confusing mess of requests and counter requests coming from the defendents corners and buttals and rebuttals thrown from the proesecution. In an unseemly display of shameless grovelling, the defence pleaded for Rolando Alonso and Suzanna Apollono to be allowed leave to travel to the Sea of Tranquility Marina Circuit, The Moon, for the 2112 Lunar Grand Prix.

    El juez, Rafael Baltasar Garzón-García Fernández, only after suffering two days of what he called "bickering", broke his gavel as he furiously halted the proceedings. Ordering the public gallery (galeria publica) to be cleared, El juez called the Atourney's to the bench before adjourning the trial. He told them "Estoy asqueado por su comportamiento de hoy. Usted trae vergüenza a esta casa sagrada de la justicia. Quiero a todos a disfrutar de unas vacaciones y le sugerimos que se tome en algún lugar lejano. Tal vez, la Luna sería un buen lugar?"

    gavel.jpg
    A gavel similar to the one broken by
    El juez, Rafael Baltasar Garzón-García Fernández

    Unfortunately for defendants Alonso and Apollono, the judge's recommendation for a holiday on The Moon does not extend to them. Alonso's defence atourney, Maria Delgado Estazio De La Del Fuego said, "Whilst it's a shame not to see Alonso and Apollono race together at the fabtastic Lunar Circuit, we are seeing an epic battle in the trial. We can take comfort from that, for sure."

    Apollono's defence agreed, saying "We will enjoy our holiday and the race, fo' sho'. Quite frankly, we look forward to a break from those two petulant prima donnas. If they carry on like this we will be joining the prosecution!"

    Sra Del Fuego said "Sí, en efecto. Los fiscales son personas muy agradables."

    The trial continues

    Brad Routon. Rootersport (A division of Rooters Interplanetary News Corp)8-)
     
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  10. teabagyokel

    teabagyokel #dejavu Valued Member

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    APEX SPORT - PRACTICE REPORT

    Getting used to the lack of aerodynamics on the Tranquility Marina, and to the larger radius tyres required, meant that Friday practice was busier than usual. It seems that, in particular, Ferrari are very strong in these extra-terrestrial conditions, with Shavnov leading the times and Nelson Piquet V looking not too shabby for once.

    Tina Rachtova's second appearance for AHR has coincided with the team buying out her contract from Always to allow her to cover for Alonso whenever the Spaniard was out of action. AHR's team principal Nicole Hamilton has expressed serious dissatisfaction with the fact her Championship leader is in court for a crime few believe he is guilty of, what with Apollono's escapades - or attempted escapades - in Iran. This was no distraction for a team in good form out on the track though.

    After insisting he was already on the Moon while sitting in the basement of his home in Colorado, Tango have done well to actually get Championship runner-up Arnold van der Liegen to the track. His team-mate, Ontário, claims to have taken anti-interdumines to prevent the problems caused in Iran, and was able to set some quick, and fourth-dimension consistent, times.

    Lord Durham has been busy celebrating the victory of "Britain and her allies" in the 1946-91 so-called "Cold War", which seems incongruous now we know the Russians were lying low. With no chauffer for practical reasons, Durham has been the surprise name troubling the Top 10.

    Join us for qualifying soon*.

    *Hopefully.
     
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  11. teabagyokel

    teabagyokel #dejavu Valued Member

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    APEX SPORT - QUALIFYING REPORT

    Qualifying is always important on the Moon; it is important to get a clean getaway in the atmosphere-lacking area. The lack of noise heading into the biomes on Friday has been corrected on Bernie Ecclestone's brain's instructions, and car noises will be automatically be recreated inside the domes automatically when a car goes past.

    Q1 Flabio Moda really were not getting on with the whole Moon thing, bringing their Earth Cars on to the circuit. The cursed phrase Earth Car wrecks its revenge on F1 yet again, and Karamalitenko and Yamamoto will not be starting the race. So starting last will be 24th place Kirtan Kakari, just behind his team-mate Écossais. Barry Jones unfortunately followed up a great China with a poor Lunar experience and starts 22nd.

    The McDonald's cars were next, with Richards finally weightness enough to outperform Bolt. So the fight was on between Al-Khalifa (on a rather promising showing) and Akuritaxpe. With the Sheikh still unable to buy talent, though, he pushed too hard and ended up moored on the moonrock, leaving Akuritaxpe to pip him in a Waltz that was, according to the Basque hero, "scarcely working".

    19: Al-Khalifa, 20: Richards, 21: Bolt, 22: Jones, 23: Écossais, 24: Kakari, DNQ: Karamalitenko, Yamamoto

    Q2 The Piquet brothers caused the first drama of Q2, by getting out of the car and fighting over whether Rolando had visited their father, Nelson Piquet IV, in hospital after a recent cardiac arrest, much to the visible disgust of Sky pundit Juan Miguel Salazar. The two managed to get back into the cars in time for the session; Rolando suitably distracted to qualify 18th behind Akuritaxpe. Always had not put their best foot forward at this Grand Prix, Senna was unable to get up to speed in the second sector and qualified 16th. This hardly upset Mary Washington, with the loyalty in the team threatened by the American going a second quicker on the third lap alone!

    O'Reilly's spin on the second lap of his only three lap runs supposedly ruined his chances, but despite this he could still manage to qualify in an impressive given the circumstances 15th position. This was especially proven to be impressive when his team-mate Chan could only qualify a couple of tenths quicker in 13th. Martin Button was uncharacteristically slow and qualified 14th. So it was between Durham's Hesketh, Washington's Always and Piquet's Ferrari for the final couple of places, so it seemed, but the sheer pace the three found at the end of the session made almost all the others glad they'd done a banker run. Piquet dropped out in 11th, while it was Perfectelli who arrogantly assumed and found his preparations for Q3 interrupted by a call of P12.

    11: N. Piquet, 12: Perfectelli, 13: Chan, 14: Button, 15: O'Reilly, 16: Senna, 17: Akuritaxpe, 18: R. Piquet

    Q3 The whole field quickly got up to speed for their first eliminator. Washington just couldn't pick up the same pace this time, but even in 10th had a huge advantage over her team-mate. Durham was somewhat on form and amazingly the wannabee-aristo was able to outpace a disappointed Reichsmuller.

    9: Reichsmuller, 10: Washington

    Durham was finally outclassed here, whilst Larsson found that the car was somewhat underfuelled. He had the presence of mind to limp back to the pits and leave just enough for the FIA to sample, which didn't seem to go down as well as you'd expect. Thus he set no time, Durham into a marvellous 7th.

    7: Durham, 8: Larsson

    Rachtova had been going quick, but her chances evaporated when she clipped the dusty outskirts of the track and ended up marooned. She was joined by another who took the loss of aero badly, namely Dzevsky.

    5: Dzevsky, 6: Rachtova

    Lakepi had also benefitted from the reduction in gravity, so much so that several years ago he moved to Moonbase City VIII to live. He was accustomed to conditions and qualified 3rd, ahead of another accustomed to lightheadedness, van der Liegen.

    3: Lakepi, 4: van der Liegen

    Even though Ontario had a renewed sense of when he is, he was still not quick enough to beat the Lunar specialist. Shavnov was 7 tenths quicker yet again at his favourite circuit, and will be difficult to stop.

    1: SHAVNOV, 2: Ontario

    And so Shavnov at his favourite circuit brings some light in space to Ferrari's miserable season. Join us for the race here at Apex Sport.
     
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  12. teabagyokel

    teabagyokel #dejavu Valued Member

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    RACE REPORT - APEX SPORT

    Here is the lap-by-lap report of the race to remind our fans who surely watched it of what happened:

    START: Shavnov gets the better start and leaves Ontario and van der Liegen fighting for 2nd with Lakepi getting a poor start. Everyone gets through the first lap without incident.

    LAP 1: Shavnov, Ontario, van der Liegen, Dzevsky, Rachtova, Lakepi, Durham, N. Piquet, Larsson, Reichsmuller

    Lap 3: The two Tango cars duel out on the track with van der Liegen attempting a cheeky move up the inside of Ontario. Meanwhile, Durham is starting a "train" behind him with some excellent defensive manoeuvres.

    Lap 4: Piquet runs wide trying to pass Durham and is picked off by an attentive Larsson. Other than that the race is settling into a pattern.

    Lap 8: The first retirement of the day occurs near the back, as Jones goes over the moon dust and into the barrier. Bit of a comedown after a great performance in China, that.

    Lap 10: van der Liegen sends another move down the side of Ontario who is just able to hold out. Ontario demands a stop to this on team radio. He is surprised to see the Dutchman so alert.

    Lap 12: Larsson gets past Durham down into turn one, giving Piquet another chance to stare at the Hesketh rear wing.

    Lap 13: Al-Khalifa passes Senna for 17th, then overcooks it into the next corner out of sheer surprise and ends up blocking half the track. Safety Car.

    Lap 14: A confused radio message at Tango means van der Liegen is called in but Ontario isn't. Shavnov leads after his pit-stop but Ontario loses lots of time pitting late.

    LAP 16 [SC]: Shavnov, van der Liegen, Dzevsky, Rachtova, Lakepi, Larsson, Durham, N. Piquet, Ontario, Reichsmuller

    Lap 17: We're off again.

    Lap 20: Ontario gets past Piquet and starts chasing Durham.

    Lap 22: Frustrated, Piquet suddenly starts setting fastest laps. The two Ferraris really on the pace, but only one of them has track position...

    Lap 24: Piquet and Ontario get to Durham at roughly the same time. Durham continues to defend manfully and frustrate the two drivers behind him.

    Lap 28: Perfectelli asked to wake up by his team, and delivers a foul-mouthed rant down the radio saying he was awake. His mood not improved when they inform him of Dzevsky brilliantly diving down the inside of van der Liegen for second place.

    Lap 30: Senna put under investigation for Al-Khalifa's crash. O'Reilly pulls up to the back of Button.

    Lap 32: Big problems! O'Reilly outbreaks himself and takes out Button, causing a load of debris to be thrown onto the track. Ontario runs into the debris and pops a tyre, and suddenly disappears, only to reappear on the same spot a minute later. Another temporal displacement there, and the FIA will be investigating his ability to race. Safety Car.

    LAP 34 [SC]: Shavnov, Dzevsky, van der Liegen, Rachtova, Lakepi, Larsson, Durham, N. Piquet, Reichsmuller, Perfectelli

    Lap 36: Shavnov loses traction on the Safety Car restart and Dzevsky dives past him. van der Liegen unable to make hey though. Stewards checking if Dzevsky was over the line when he made the pass.

    Lap 37: No action on Senna.

    Lap 39: Dzevsky called in for a stop-go penalty. Perfectelli loses out as he ignores his team telling him not to pit that lap and ends up stacked behind his team-mate.

    Lap 40: Larsson pits early and starts putting on the pace.

    Lap 42: Lakepi regrets not pitting earlier as he sees Larsson in front of him, Rachtova however just about noses ahead!

    LAP 44: Shavnov, van der Liegen, Rachtova, Larsson, Lakepi, Durham, N. Piquet, Dzevsky, Reichsmuller, Washington

    Lap 48: 5 laps to go! Piquet finally makes his move on Durham, Dzevsky pulls up to the back of the Hesketh.

    Lap 50: Shavnov cruising home. Lakepi weaves around behind Larsson but can make no tracks.

    Lap 51: Bolt pulls in with a cooking oil failure. Chan slips on some of Bolt's deposits and loses a inconsequential place to Akuritaxpe.

    FINISH: Shavnov weaves across the line, his fourth win at the Lunar GP. Great scenes at Ferrari!

    RESULT: 1. D. Shavnov (Ferrari)
    2. A. van der Liegen (Tango)
    3. T. Rachtova (AHR)
    4. L. Larsson (AII)
    5. K. Lakepi (MSW)
    6. N. Piquet (Ferrari)
    7. L. Durham (Hesketh)
    8. K. Dzevsky (Skoda)
    9. T. Reichsmuller (MSW)
    10. M. Washington (Always)

    CTA.png

    CTA.png

    So a less than thrilling race, but see you all for the next one!
     
    mjo, Jen, McZiderRed and 1 other person like this.

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